Troubled
by HarryandGinny
Summary: A woman who is not who she seems to be tries to help someone. The trouble is, she can't.


Petunia Dursley of Number 4 Privit Drive lay down, trying to hold back tears. They were trying so desperatly to escape, but she wouldn't let them. She couldn't.  
  
She covered her face with her hands, and she felt water cascading down her cheeks. She wiped them furiously away, but it was no use. They kept coming down harder.  
  
How dare he! How could he not care? Why didn't he understand? It wasn't her fault! She only wanted to mourn her sister in peace, but he wouldn't let her. If his sister died, she would at least pretend to mourn her. But he obviously was above that.  
  
She thought back to the day before. Had it only been yesterday? Yesterday, when she awoke to her sons cries. Yesterday when she went to pick up the milk bottles. Yesterday when she saw a little boy lying on her doorstep, crying his little heart out. Yesterday when she read the letter, telling her that Lily was dead.  
  
She had to pretend not to care. He was so awful to her, Vernon. But she couldn't do anything about it, because she would probably wind up in the hospital. It wasn't fair to Harry or Dudley, they deserved a nice home to live in. But with Vernon around, she would have to abuse Harry the way that Vernon abused her. Her heart went out to the little boy.  
  
The door downstairs slammed. "WOMAN!!" A voice screamed. Petunia quickly ran to the bathroom, making sure that her eyes weren't red. But they were. She'd have to say allergies, she decided. She hurried down the stairs.  
  
"Good, there you are. Where is Dudley?" asked Vernon. Petunia tried not to vomit as she looked at his ugly face.  
  
"He's in the playpen, playing with his toys," she answered. "Harry's in the cupboard under the stairs. I fixed a room for him there."  
  
She had indeed fixed a room for him, making it as comfortable as possible without Vernon noticing. She had to make it look awful, but there were little bits of comfort here and there. She had bought a large laundrey basket, as big as they came, and filled it with pillows and blankets. Vernon would be happy, since it was only a washbin, but Petunia knew as a fact that it was comfortable. Her family hadn't been well off, and she had to sleep in one for a few years.  
  
That night, before she went to sleep, she made a silent prayer. 'Lord, watch over Lily, James, and Harry.'  
  
********************************5 Years Later****************************************  
  
Petunia woke at nine in the morning to small cries from her nephews cupboard. Vernon wasn't there, so she rushed to find out what was wrong. She opened the door to see Harry sitting up in the bed that she had bought for him. It was very cramped, but it was the best that she could do.  
  
"Whats wrong, Harry?" she asked gently. He turned his tearstained face toward her.  
  
"I miss my mummy and daddy," he said in a tiny voice.  
  
Petunia's heart went out to him. 'Poor thing,' she thought, as she gathered him into her arms. "I do, too, Harry," she told him quietly. "I do, too."  
  
Harry looked at her, surprised. She was hardly ever nice to him. But maybe.... Nah. He shook it out of his mind. 'I might as well make the best of it,' he though, snuggling up to her. Maybe she did like him.  
  
Petunia tried not to let tears fall, but one escaped. She let it slide down her cheek, without bothering to wipe it away.  
  
'I miss you, Lily. And you, James. I'm trying to watch over Harry, but it's hard to be a good aunt with Vernon around. I'm so sorry.'  
  
*****************************5 Years Later*******************************************  
  
"Dad! Harry's got a letter!"  
  
Petunia nearly jumped. 'No!!' she thought desperatly. 'Vernon will kill him!' But it was too late. He had already grabbed it. Shaking it open, he glanced at it. His face did an interesting display of colors. "Petunia!" he cried. Her face pale, she went over to him.  
  
"Oh, my goodness-Vernon!" She had learned how to be a good actress over the years. She wanted so badly to run to Harry and hug him, but she couldn't.  
  
As Vernon told Harry and Dudley to go, she tried to figure out what to do. Finally, she came up with a solution.  
  
"Vernon! It says 'The Cupboard Under the Stairs.' Maybe we should move him into Dudley's second bedroom?"  
  
Vernon considered this, and finally nodded tightly.  
  
Over the next few days, more and more letters came. Vernon was flipping, and she was pretending to be terrified. Finally, they went to a small hut in the middle of the ocean. She made a bed for Dudley on the sofa, and gave Harry a thin blanket. Feeling horrible, she went to bed.  
  
At midnight, she jumped up. She hadn't been able to sleep because of her guilty feelings, but she wasn't even going to try now. Something was knocking on the door.  
  
Within the next few minutes, she started understanding. But she still had to act terrified, no matter how happy she was. In fact, when Harry asked if they had known, she had to blow up! She felt so horrible for that, but Vernon had thrown her a threatening look. She had to do something, because he had threatened to kill Harry the next time anything went wrong with anyone in the family. It reminded her of a book, 'The Whipping Boy.' Someone does something wrong, Harry gets the punishment.  
  
Finally, Hagrid and Harry left. Petunia hoped dearly that Harry would be happier.  
  
'Lily, James, I'm so sorry for saying those awful things! God bless you all.'  
  
******************************4 Years Later*****************************************  
  
"He's back."  
  
Petunia lifted her head slowly. Had Harry just said what she thought he had said? The monster who had killed her sister and brother in law, and had tortured Harry continuously throughout the last 4 years, was back?  
  
Apparently, he was. She looked at Harry sympathetically, but fearfully. Was he after Harry now? She so hoped not. If he was, then he was in mortal danger.  
  
But he was. When Vernon started questioning the poor boy about it, he said that he was in trouble, and that he had most likely sent the dementors after him.  
  
"Out."  
  
Petunia looked at Vernon, confused. What did he mean, Out? He explained himself a moment later.  
  
"Out. You're not staying in my house, putting my family in danger, while some looney is after you!!"  
  
Petunia stifled a cry, and felt her eyes well up. Would he really send Harry onto the streets? The poor boy had just saved his son!!  
  
Suddenly, another owl swooped in. It dropped a red envelope on Petunia's head. She screamed.  
  
Harry made a move to grab the letter, but she looked at it.  
  
"Vernon!! Its addressed to me!" she cried. Suddenly, it the envelope burst into flames, and a horrible voice filled the kitchen.  
  
"REMEMBER MY LAST, PETUNIA."  
  
She turned pale. She was so relieved, but she couldn't show it. She sank back into a chair.  
  
"He has to stay, Vernon," she said weakly.  
  
That night, she went to bed. She was terrified, worried about Harry, but also happy that she had managed to keep him safe.  
  
'Lily, James, I'm doing my best. I love you.' 


End file.
